The Healing Power Of An Open Heart – ‘The Snow Child’ a novel by Eowyn Ivey
The Snow Child
Amazon.com & Amazon.co.uk
The opening of this novel finds Jack and Mabel in Alaska’s frontier country, in the 1920s, ten years after the loss of their stillborn baby. They have chosen to withdraw from family and friends as a means of coping with their searing loss and their ongoing childless state. Harsh weather and even harsher conditions find the couple, now in their early fifties, in their second harsh winter in Alaska, alone and isolated. They are struggling emotionally and physically and are withdrawn from the world and from each other. The Alaskan landscape – both beautiful and ferocious – echoes their desolation and their ongoing emotional struggle.
So the scene is set for this moving and enigmatic story of The Snow Child. A magical child made from snow or a child abandoned in the Alaskan landscape – which is she? Whatever she is and wherever she comes from, as this snow child enters the lonely couples’ world, she breathes life into them. The absence of children had set them apart from family, community and each other. As they had withdrawn deeper into themselves their grief was not resolved, just buried even further from sight. Their own feelings and emotions were inaccessible to themselves as well as to each other. It is only at the point where they begin to open up, to open their heart to the magical snow child and the madness of their neighbours – the Benson family – that they begin to ‘thaw,’ just as the landscape does after a harsh Alaskan winter. They finally begin to connect with each other, connect with Faina the snow child, and connect with the community around them.
We continue to wonder, is the snow child real or is she a magical manifestation? So weaves the story, intriguing and compelling as each page turns, offering thoughts on grief and loss, coping with the cruelest of losses – that of childlessness – and revealing how grief can isolate and fester loneliness. Of all the things I take from this memorable novel one thing is uppermost: the way an open heart can be a gateway to coping with loss. Only when Jack and Mabel open themselves up to life, and to other people, do they begin to cope with their own loss, talk about it with each other, and begin to live a truly meaningful life. While The Snow Child is not about lessons, this is one which we surely know to be true. It is borne out by numerous studies on grief and loss. Withdrawal leads to shriveling, isolation and loneliness. Whereas an open heart – though prone to deep pain as well as exquisite joy – allows us to truly feel, live and experience both the horror and the beauty of life. It is in this connection to our own feelings, to those of others and to the world of nature around us, that we truly live.
The Snow Child is a beautiful and riveting novel which gives a vivid portrayal of the hardships of frontier life in Alaska, alongside the magical power of human love and connection. It is both poignantly sad and yet full of hope. It describes with great insight not only grief and loss but also a way to find a meaningful life alongside these most difficult emotions.
I wonder if you’ve come across this novel or have any thoughts about having an open or closed heart when coping with loss and grief. I’d love to hear from you.
I’ve never come across this book, but it sounds like a really wonderful read, Ruth.
I can understand the tendency to want to withdraw from others when dealing with deep hurts or a loss, and I think there is something to be said for introspection and for the need for a bit of “alone time” when facing certain difficulties, but there’s a delicate balance there.
I always try to live my life with an open heart, it gets me hurt sometimes (and I don’t want to minimize the extent of that hurt, it can take a while to heal), but it also makes life more meaningful.
Great post, Ruth, thanks for sharing this.x
Hi Julie, thanks so much for leaving your thoughts. I completely agree about the value of introspection and that at times we need to withdraw a little. The problems can come when this is no longer a short-term solution as we can begin to close down. You’re so right about the open heart and hurt. Like you, though, I wouldn’t want to live any other way. I think you’d like the book, Julie. The experience of frontier life is brilliantly told – the nature and living off the land – wonderfully portrayed. Take good care and lovely to see you here xx
Hi Ruth this novel sounds fascinating and no I have not come across it before.. But you are so right in what you say.. Grief unless it is unleashed and dealt with can have overwhelming consequences..
While its good to find space and solitude to come to terms with your own emotions some go the other way and shut themselves off.
I have seen this first hand in my own family how people withdraw and become isolated.. It happened with an elderly aunt who has now passed to spirit. but she and her husband were unable to conceive and he died quite suddenly in his late 70’s.. All her life had been poured into him, and she was unable to cope after his death.. Not coming to terms with her grief she then became hardened
She shut herself away and eventually had to go into a nursing home.. There too she deprived herself not moving from her room.. shutting the world out.. There world had always revolved around themselves, and I think had their hearts been more open to so too their lives would have been richer…. She died a very sad lonely lady, who would not let anyone enter her heart.. Mores the pity!…
Wishing you a Wonderful Weekend Ruth and many thanks for your lovely visit! 🙂
Hugs Sue xx
Hi Sue, thank you so much for your wise comment. I totally agree about needing personal space to deal with things while not shutting ourselves off. Grief really does need to be expressed and shared if we are to cope well with it and not be destroyed by it. This wonderful novel demonstrates this so powerfully. Your Aunt’s is a sad story and illustrates just what the book shows and the post highlights – closing ourselves off and withdrawing from life leads to loneliness and isolation. Also, as you point out, placing all our love with one person and closing others out can also lead to similar pain. Have a lovely weekend too Sue and thank you, as always, for your great support and your own open heart. With love, Ruth xx
Ruth,
Wonderful article. I find myself reading nothing but non-fiction books, but I need to read more fiction. Fiction seems to often be just as eye-opening, if not more so, as non-fiction reads.
Claudia
Hi Claudia, glad you enjoyed the article. For many years I read mostly fiction and I found it equally helpful in terms of finding lessons and learning how to cope with life etc. This is really why I wanted to broaden out my reach from pure self-help and psychology as I think the value of fiction and memoir are equal to non-fiction. Thanks so much for visiting. 🙂
This definately looks like a book I would enjoy Ruth. I do need to read more fiction too!
It really is a beautiful book and I think you would enjoy it Carolyn. It is a book from, and for, the heart and it is one of those that stays with you. I am eager to re-read it – which is always a good sign! Lovely to see you here. 🙂
This looks wonderful, Ruth. And I love the book cover — it draws me in right away! I’ll have to add it to the ever-growing list! 🙂
I love the cover too Angela – yes, definitely add it to the list. It would be great to hear your thoughts on it when you can fight your way through to it! Thanks so much for stopping by 🙂