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A Memoir Of Love – ‘Goodbye Dearest Holly: Ten Years On’ by Kevin Wells

Goodby Dearest Holly: Ten Years On
Amazon.com & Amazon.co.uk

It is hard to recall a more beautiful and yet ultimately harrowing image than that of two ten-year old missing girls, in Manchester United T-Shirts, smiling to camera. This image became known worldwide, on 4th August 2002, twelve years ago today. The photo was of Holly Wells and Jessica Chapman – the two children from Soham who were murdered by Ian Huntley. Kevin Wells’ memoir of this tragedy makes powerful reading. Goodbye Dearest Holly: Ten Years On, released in 2012, is an updated account of this most public of family tragedies. It details how this one father and his family have coped with the worst of all imaginable things – the murder of Holly – a beautiful daughter/sister/niece/grandchild and friend.

The enormous publicity surrounding this crime meant that the family had more than pure grief to endure. Alongside some uplifting stories of help and support they also had to deal with a mass media who were daily, often hourly, intent on revealing news which the family was sometimes not privy to. They endured lack of information from the Police. Ongoing rules were placed on their own behaviour as the family were warned not to show too much emotion in court lest it help the defence case. Even when, without warning, they were shockingly faced with Huntley’s explanation/fabrication of what had happened to the two young children on the night they were murdered, they had to try to contain their emotion. It all feels unendurable. Hate mail, people riding on the publicity of the case, joke T-Shirts being sold on Ebay, and so it goes on. As you read of these things, of the parents looking at the post-mortem report, visiting Holly’s body, listening in court to lies and manipulations, living in fear that Huntley would be acquitted, knowing damning things that the jury could not be told, it is impossible to comprehend how such things could be borne.

Ultimately, though, Kevin Wells describes a family who have found a way to bear this, to live with their loss and not allow it to destroy them. Writing this memoir was a tribute to Holly and also, in part, therapeutic. As he explores and explains a loss that few of us will ever be forced to cope with, this updated memoir, ten years on from Holly’s death, sees Kevin talk of the things people still say to him. He describes how little bereavement and loss is understood and shines a light on his work with the charity Grief Encounter, which has enriched his own life and the lives of others. It is here that we see the value of travelling for a few moments with him in this darkest of journeys. By reading, we stretch our hands out and are willing to listen and imagine some tiny shadow of this family’s pain. We learn things which can impact on our own lives and the lives of those we encounter. For alongside our own experiences, this is how we learn about grief. We learn how different people can, and do, cope with loss and find a meaningful life alongside their pain and tragedy. We can also take some time to contemplate how we treat those who have suffered loss, what words we use, and the value of the things we say to them.

It is often something that people find hard to understand – the parallel world of stark grief with happy moments, and even plans for the future. Kevin explains that there is not a day that passes when Holly is not with them, all the joy she brought to their lives, all that has been lost, and all that can now never be. Yet amidst this most tragic of events we see the spirit of a family who survives, who thrives, and who is determined to still find good in life. This is a most moving memoir about love and its power. If you are able to read it, you will see both the worst and the best of what human beings are capable of.

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8 Comments

  1. Ruth, even reading your post was tough; for reasons I’m not entirely sure. The book would probably be beyond my emotional capacity to absorb such heartache. I can still recall the shock of seeing those two wonderfully happy faces on the television news! Twelve years ago! It seems so much more recent.

    1. It really is a tough read, Paul, but the family are amazing. What they have coped with and how they have done it can help us all I think. I agree with you, I cannot believe it is so long ago. That image remains emblazoned on the British psyche. I hope that you’re doing well. All my best wishes to you and Jean and all of your beautiful animals.

    1. Yes Julie, you are right on both counts. It is incredible to see what the human spirit can cope with and helps us all to see what is possible for us in our own lives. I’ll be popping over later. xx

  2. Ruth I remember so well these two beautiful young girls,and like Paul I do not think I could bring myself to read the book.. My 12 yrs is beyond belief.. How time is spinning us around..
    I know many suffer unimaginable pain and loss.. The human spirit is remarkable in its ability to heal and grow from such experiences..
    Love to you dear Ruth.. and thank you for your recent visits.. Always do I enjoy them.. 🙂 Love Sue

    1. It’s an impossible image for us all to forget Sue. You are so right, the human spirit is immense in what it can cope with. Lots of love to you Sue and I hope that you’re taking care and gaining some relaxation and strength. Take good care my friend and so lovely to have you pop by for a natter. xxxx

      1. Ruth.. Yes I have now adjusted I think! LOL to the relaxed day of pleasing one’s self.. Some days spin ever faster and I seem not to have achieved anything.. Yet others Spin just as fast only to look back and be well satisfied with all I got done.. 🙂 xxx

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